The Maleficent Seven: From the World of Skulduggery Pleasant Page 15

  “Because he also lost the ability to count,” said Donegan.

  “That was temporary,” snapped Gracious. “We’re in, aren’t we?”

  “Yes, we are,” said Vex. “And now we need to get to the sword without encountering any mages or Cleavers. Saracen? Think you can guide us?”

  “Sure,” said Saracen, and closed his eyes. He swivelled his head slowly, and then pointed. His eyes opened. “This way.”

  ow long before they’re in position?”

  Sanguine glanced at his watch. “A little under five minutes.”

  Jack nodded, and looked out over the city. “Beautiful here.”

  “Cold.”

  “Well, you would say that, wouldn’t you? You’re from warmer climes. You’re soft.”

  “Is that so?”

  “Of course it is,” said Tanith, approaching from behind. “You’re a Texas boy. You’re used to being pampered by the sun. In London, we’ve got to be that little bit tougher, don’t we, Jack?”

  “Indeed we do,” Jack answered, and he hobbled to the edge of the roof.

  “How long have you been around, anyway?” Sanguine asked Jack.

  “Me? Don’t know, really. Don’t remember bein’ a kid. Don’t remember family or nothin’. I can remember the last few hundred years, and then things go foggy. I remember bits and pieces from before that, but...” He shrugged. “For all I know, I’ve always been alive, but I’m only able to remember the last few centuries.”

  “You might be lucky,” said Sanguine. “I remember every little detail about my childhood, and I wish I didn’t.”

  “At least you know where you came from.”

  Sanguine grunted, didn’t say anything.

  “And at least you’re not alone,” Jack continued. “As long as you keep those sunglasses on, no one’s ever gonna look at you and think anythin’ is out of the ordinary. But me? All I am is out of the ordinary.”

  Sanguine stayed where he was while Tanith joined Jack by the edge. “Maybe if you left London a little bit more,” she said, “maybe travelled the world, you could have found more like you.”

  Jack gave a little laugh. “That’s assumin’ that there are others like me. I know you say you’ve got all this super secret information on what I am, but I’ve come to the conclusion a long time ago: I’m the only one of my kind, and my time is runnin’ out. One of these days I’m gonna make the wrong move or take on the wrong victim and then no more me. And when I die, my species dies.”

  Tanith folded her arms against the cold. “Ever think about settling down? Maybe try raising a few springheeled kiddies? They wouldn’t be pure-blood, but that’d probably be for the best, if I’m being honest.”

  “Sure,” said Jack, “no problem. Because I got scores of women linin’ up for the chance to settle down with me.”

  “You don’t need scores,” said Tanith. “You just need one.”

  “Yeah? You offerin’?”

  “Not me,” she laughed. “But maybe I know one who might be interested. Maybe you do too.”

  Jack hesitated, like he didn’t want to appear too eager. “I... I have had my eye on someone.”

  “Have you told her?”

  “What? You told me the best thing was not to say anything. To ignore her.”

  “I did?” said Tanith, frowning. “Oh, yeah. Well, I was busy. I really just wanted you to shut up.”

  Jack sighed. “Anyway, what would I say? You’re a pretty little thing – do you want to spend the rest of your life with me?”

  Sanguine couldn’t stop himself. “Pretty?” he echoed.

  Jack whipped his head round. “Don’t you even think about insultin’ her.”

  Sanguine held up his hands. “No, no, hey, whatever floats your boat, man. Far as I’m concerned, Tanith’s got the prettiest face in all the land...”

  “Aw, thank you,” said Tanith.

  “... followed closely by that China Sorrows.”

  Tanith scowled.

  “But yeah,” he continued, “I suppose, in her own way, Annis is a pretty little thing.”

  Jack stared at him. “What?”

  “She might be in need of a bath, and a hairbrush, some moisturiser and maybe some light cosmetic surgery, but slap a new dress on her, nothing too revealing or tight, and you’d have... well, you’d have a short, squat woman in a dress. Which is great, if that’s what you’re after.”

  “I don’t fancy Black Annis.”

  “OK then, you love her, whatever.”

  “I don’t love Black Annis! Why does everyone think I love Black Annis?”

  Tanith frowned at Jack. “OK, I don’t understand. Who have we been talking about?”

  “Sabine!”

  “Sabine? You and Sabine? You? And Sabine?”

  Jack’s face burned, and he turned away. “I know it’s ridiculous. Beautiful young woman like her. Ugly old freak like me.”

  “It is fairly ridiculous,” Sanguine agreed.

  “The heart wants what the heart wants,” Tanith said, patting Jack’s shoulder.

  Jack shook his head. “I’m a fool. I’m deludin’ myself, is what I’m doing. Look at me. Why would anyone as pretty as her want anythin’ to do with me? And I try to be charmin’ and witty when she’s around and I just come off as... I dunno.”

  “Desperate?” said Sanguine. “Sad? Pathetic?”

  “Yeah. All those things. I repulse her. She looks at me and her stomach turns. She talks to me and all she wants to do is walk away. I’ll never get her. I’m destined to be alone for the rest of my miserable life.”

  “You know what she told me?” Tanith said. “She said she’s on the lookout for a new man. She said she’s bored of the type she usually dates − she wants someone a bit... different.”

  “I’m different, all right.”

  “She said she doesn’t care about looks,” Tanith said. “All she wants is someone to make her laugh. Can you make her laugh, Jack?”

  “I... I think so.”

  “Because you know something else? When she was saying all this to me, her eyes kept drifting over to you.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Seriously.”

  Jack went quiet. Sanguine imagined that he could see the hope blossom deep within him, and Jack stood a bit straighter, and held his head up a bit higher, so that when Tanith swung her sword, the head came cleanly off without the need for any hacking.

  The body crumpled and the head bounced beside it, losing the top hat as it came rolling to a gentle stop.

  “I could have done it,” said Sanguine. “Didn’t have to be you.”

  Tanith shrugged and wiped the blood from her blade. “Seemed only fair that I be the one,” she said. “Did you like the bit about Sabine maybe fancying him?”

  “I did. Thought it was a really sweet thing to do for him in his last moments.”

  “Yeah,” said Tanith, “that’s me all over. Give me sixty seconds to get to the others, then dump his body over the side.”

  She jumped off the roof and disappeared.

  Sanguine moved the body to the very edge and waited. When the sixty seconds were up, he counted out fifteen more, just to be generous, then nudged the body over the edge with his foot. The body of Springheeled Jack fell clumsily, with none of the grace he had displayed when he used to dance across rooftops. It hit the street far below in a wet, tangled mess of limbs and broken bones, and from where he stood Sanguine could hear the screams of passers-by. He kicked the head off after it, and picked up the top hat and threw it into the wind.

  anith waited until the last of the sentries had run to investigate the source of all the screaming, then slipped out from hiding. She moved quickly down a narrow street, saw Thames Chabon and three of his men running up from the other side. They met in the middle beside a large metal rubbish skip and he tapped the wall.

  “This is what we call the tradesman’s entrance,” he said. “It’ll take you into a storeroom. There’s never anyone in there. What you
do next is not my concern.”

  Tanith examined the wall. “How does it open?”

  “It doesn’t,” said Chabon. “You stand here, activate the mechanism, and you turn intangible for three seconds. In those three seconds you walk straight through.”

  “How do I activate the mechanism?”

  “Sorry, not sharing that little secret. I’ll activate it for you, once you give me my payment. How you get out again, that’s up to you.”

  “I have that covered,” she said. “Please stand back, I don’t want you to spook my associates.”

  Once Chabon and his men stepped behind the skip, Tanith took out her phone, pressed SEND. Moments later, Sabine ran up, followed by Annis and Wilhelm. Dusk came last. His fists were clenched and he was sweating. His body trembled. Following Tanith’s instruction, he hadn’t taken his serum, and he was fighting the change. Tanith kept an eye on him.

  “Where is it?” Wilhelm asked, fear in his voice. “Where’s the door? You said you’d be meeting your contact. Where is he?”

  “Wilhelm,” Tanith said, “calm down.”

  “The sentries will be back at any moment! They’ll find us! They’ll arrest us, or kill us! We have to run!”

  Sabine stepped up to him, slapped him hard across the face. He stared at her in shock.

  “Stop panicking,” Sabine said.

  “OK,” he mumbled.

  Sabine looked at Tanith. “Do you know how we get in?”

  “I do.”

  “Then what are we waiting for?”

  “I just have to pay the man,” Tanith said, and watched how wide Sabine’s eyes got when Chabon’s men grabbed her from behind.

  “Hello, Sabine,” said Chabon as she struggled. “Did you really think you’d be able to avoid me forever?”

  “Tanith,” said Sabine, “please, help me, he’ll kill me—”

  “That’s the risk you take when you con a gangster,” Tanith told her. “Mr Chabon, activate the mechanism and our business will be concluded.”

  “Tanith, no!” Sabine cried. “Annis, do something!”

  Black Annis sniffed. “Maybe this’ll teach you not to steal other women’s men.”

  “What? What the hell are you...? Wilhelm! Dusk! Help me!”

  Wilhelm stared at his shoes, and Dusk didn’t seem to even notice Sabine’s predicament, so preoccupied was he with his own discomfort.

  “Take her to the van,” Chabon said. His men dragged Sabine backwards, covering her mouth to silence her screams. The last Tanith saw of her, her eyes were wide and full of fear and then she vanished in the shadows.

  “Group together,” said Chabon, “and face the wall. On the count of three, you walk forward quickly. Very quickly, do you understand? If you become solid halfway through, it’ll be messy.”

  Tanith faced the wall. Chabon was somewhere behind them. She fought the urge to peek. Knowing how to sneak in here would be very handy indeed.

  “Three,” Chabon said, “two, one. Go.”

  A light hit them from somewhere and Tanith’s entire body buzzed. She held her hand up to the wall and she could see the bricks through it. It was the hand of a ghost – pale and slightly luminescent. She walked forward, forcing herself to keep her eyes open as she passed through the wall, almost laughing at the sensation. Then she was on the other side, in a dimly lit room, and she returned to normal.

  “Everyone in one piece?” she asked.

  Wilhelm was frantically searching himself to make sure he was OK. Annis didn’t bother, and Dusk didn’t care. He winced in pain, and Tanith saw how jagged his teeth had become. They were splitting his gums and filling his mouth. It wouldn’t be long now.

  “I thought we were a team,” Annis said.

  Tanith looked down at her. “We are a team.”

  “And Sabine? Wasn’t she part of it, too?”

  “She was a very important part of it. She was payment.”

  “Are you going to betray us like you betrayed her?”

  “No,” said Tanith, “of course not. Sabine didn’t belong here and you know it. She’s not like us. But we needed her, and now that she’s gone, the rest of us can forge ahead. You. Me. Dusk. Sanguine. Even Wilhelm here.”

  “And Jack,” said Annis.

  Tanith nodded. “Of course. And Jack. The team wouldn’t be the team without Jack. Come on, we don’t have much time.”

  She knew this Sanctuary well, so she led them through the corridors nobody used, ducking into empty rooms to avoid Cleaver patrols. The closer they got to the Repository, though, the harder it was to stay unnoticed. Still, their luck held much longer than she thought it would. They were actually in sight of the Repository door before three sorcerers stumbled upon them.

  The sorcerers stared, then backed away.

  “Dusk,” Tanith said softly as the sorcerers turned and ran.

  Dusk took off in pursuit, low to the ground, almost loping after them. He pulled at his chest and his skin parted instantly and the vampire bounded from Dusk’s human form. It disappeared round the corner, already closing the distance between it and its prey.

  “Let’s go,” Tanith said. “Before it comes back for us.”

  They ran to the door, slipped in and closed it after them. The Repository was massive. Books and magical items lined the shelves, some open to display, some held behind unbreakable glass. The sword was in a case at the back of the room, and Tanith led the others straight to it and a voice said—

  “I wouldn’t take one more step if I were you.”

  Tanith turned slowly, smiling at Vex and the others as they stood there looking all cool. She waited for the Cleavers to pounce, and when they didn’t, her smile widened.

  “They don’t know you’re here, do they?” she said. “No one knows. Look at us. Peas in a pod, aren’t we? We break in here, you break in here. We want to steal the sword, you want to steal the sword. A merry old time had by all.”

  “There is a difference, though,” said Vex. “There are six of us, and only three of you.”

  “Yeah,” Tanith said, “but somewhere in this Sanctuary, we have a vampire.”

  “Which would slaughter you as soon as it would slaughter us,” said Saracen. “Hello, Tanith. You’re looking well.”

  “Saracen Rue and Frightening Jones,” said Tanith. “Two ex-boyfriends. And Aurora. Hi, Aurora. And all of you wanting to kill me. This isn’t good for my self-esteem, you know.”

  “We’re not here to kill you,” said Frightening. “We’re here to stop you. To bring you in, if we can.”

  “So they can cure me? I don’t need to be cured. Look at me. Do I not look happy? I think everyone just needs to take a step back, relax, and accept that this is the new me. I’m just like the old me, but better.”

  “You’re not getting the sword,” said Vex. “We’d destroy it before we let you get your hands on it.”

  Her laugh was so sudden and so genuine that it actually made Vex frown, and she said, “Well, if I had known that earlier, I could have just stayed at home!”

  “Wait,” he said, “so you’re destroying the weapons, that’s what you’re doing?”

  Tanith grinned. “Of course. You want to use them to kill Darquesse, and I want to melt them down to slag before she even turns up. I’ve seen the future. I’ve seen what she becomes. People like you, you’re going to need God-Killer weapons just to get her to notice you.”

  “And the rest of your little gang?” Saracen said, looking at Annis and Wilhelm. “I can understand why Tanith wants the world to end – she’s got a Remnant living inside her – but what about you, Annis?”

  “I’ve lived in this world for over two hundred years,” Annis said, mumbling slightly. “Haven’t made one friend. No one’s ever loved me, no one’s ever cared for me. It won’t be so bad, seeing the world being burnt to a cinder.”

  “Wilhelm?” said Vex. “You can’t tell me you want to die.”

  Wilhelm licked his lips. “I just... I don’t want to die, no, but..
. But if I do this, I get my reward. We all get our rewards. I’m really sorry about, you know, about being a traitor and everything, but it was an offer I couldn’t turn down...”

  “Don’t apologise,” said Tanith. “It’s boring. Become one with your spineless nature, Wilhelm. It’s the only way people will like you.”

  “Tanith Low,” said Vex, “you’re under arrest.”

  “You can’t arrest me from all the way over there.”

  “What do you say we meet in the middle?”

  “I can do that,” Tanith said, grinning as she went for her sword.

  And then the alarm went off.

  eavy doors slammed shut, alarms wailed and all around them Cleavers were appearing. Mages burst from a hidden tunnel, hands and eyes glowing with power, flames burning in their palms. It was a trap. It was a trap and they’d all walked right into it.

  “Nobody,” said a narrow man as he approached, “move.”

  Vex looked at the others, making sure they weren’t about to do something stupid. Then he looked at Tanith and her gang. Annis was whipping her head around, eyes wide in alarm, but as yet her skin wasn’t turning blue, so that was a good sign. Wilhelm shrieked, of course, and Tanith stayed calm, a slightly mocking smile on her face.

  The narrow man’s name was Palaver Graves. When Grand Mage Strom had been killed, Cothernus Ode moved up to take his place, and Graves in turn had stepped in to fill Ode’s place as an Elder. Vex hadn’t had much to do with him over the years, had met him once or twice, but had no idea if he liked him or not.

  “Look at all you pesky little flies,” said Graves slowly, enjoying the moment, “all trapped helplessly in my web.”

  Yeah, Vex was pretty sure he didn’t like this guy.

  “Dexter Vex,” said Graves. “Saracen Rue. Gracious O’Callahan. Three Irish mages breaking into the English Sanctuary to steal a weapon of unstoppable power... some might say that is reason enough to go to war.”

  “This has nothing to do with the Irish Sanctuary,” said Saracen. “We’re here on our own behalf.”

  “Yes, yes,” Graves said, “you would say that, wouldn’t you? And who do you have with you? Frightening Jones, operative from the largest Sanctuary in Africa. Donegan Bane, rogue English mage.”